Friday, October 22, 2010

The Elle Scare take 2!

So apparently these are your two most feared things Elle?
That's my mums dog pepper...fear no. 2 and yes thats a spider around her neck...fear no. 1...BOO!
Check this out... I have an inspection next week so thought I'd better tidy the garden up a bit...you know the annual mow...the weed pull etc. I was concentrating very hard on pulling that green weed, bottom right of shot, looked up and RIGHT infront of my face was that MASSIVE spider!...Needless to say I exclaimed "AAAGH....and i'm done!" and that weed never got pulled!
I should actually be nicer to Elle, I may need to get some bag flood advice off her, I was walking through northgate today and I thought to myself "hmm whats that dripping down my leg?...no, haven't wet myself...no, noone is following me with a hose...must be coming from my bag" So I bring my bag around and find that my water bottle lid wasn't on properly and there is water dripping everywhere from my bag, I fix the lid, and with bag still dripping continue on my way to the ice cream shop (yes that's right folks there's a baskin robbins in northgate) and it was like a BILLION degrees...So ANYHO i'm at the ice cream shop and the lady said "Excuse me love, you realise your bags dripping?"...i'm like "Yeah, thanks, it's my water bottle, all fixed now" Awkward smile...then drip drip drip off I go down the escalator with my ice cream.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Did I mention i'm a squillionaire?

For those of you who have, in the past, doubted my french heritage, and tried to pass it off as 'just a name' ...this ones for you!
Check this out!...ok so it may be a little small to read so i'll paraphrase for you Dear Collette blah blah blah...firstly this is utterly confidential...blah blah blah....pls don't post on your blog...blah blah blah i'm a Barrister ...blah blah to the late Mr David Collette (yep peeps if you missed it there's the connection! Apparenlty I have some link with a random dead guy just cause my first name and his last name are the same! WHO KNEW)...blah blah blah...he was rich blah blah blah...and happened to leave you FIVE MILLION & FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND EUROS...

Yep that's right! For all the uneducated..that translates to a cool 8Mil...so yeah...i'm loaded!
It's totally legit! I mean who hasn't heard of Salazar Solicitors/Abogados, they are totally the BIGGEST international firm ever!

So peeps i'm off to email this guy all my bank details...I'll be on some tropical island with my hot as BF sipping Pina Colada's if anyone wants me ...okay okay i'm only joking...i'll be drinking Lemon Squash!

Peace out poorpers!